Hello and Happy-No-Longer-New Year!!!
With my busy life on Facebook, I often forget to blog and just write those 420 charater-status updates on Fb as part of my random rumbling and grumpling. Today i will give this a try!
I want to do something I have not done before- at least not to strangers- like you and them. You must be wondering what’s up with her now. No, don’t run away with your mouth (that’s the lastest phrase I have acquired from my Shona friend). This is not a resolution; I didnt make any this year- I’m still working on the ones I made in 1999 at the turn of the millenium and the year I sat for my O-levels.
So, yea, today i will talk about love. Strange ne? I know I know.
You see I find love -or is it loving- quite strange! At the end of last year my very good brother and friend, Raphael, who happens to be Italian but loves his dagga and Black Label diet, asked me to submit poems for a collection/anthology on Love and Romance. Your guess is as good as mine, I didn’t and still haven’t. I am not sure that I will (I promised him for the umpteenth time that I will when we met in Newtown last Saturday). Ok, where was I? Yes, writing about love is not something I do…well, I am not sure if I love either.
That not withsatnding, I have decided to write about love today. I hope that no one reads this blog post!
Anyway, so by now you all know I practically do not have a love (aka sex) life. This is due to numerous, and I mean numerous, reasons that I still havent prepared myself to disclose (should I say yet?). So last night was quite something else (direct translation, I cant remember from which of my many languages).
I left campus at around six in the evening and on the way decided to pass by my friend who has been ailing for a few days now. Between the two of us we can chat endlessly so I am sure that you don’t expect me to remember what we were talking about before we found ourselves talking about my last ex-boyfriend ( I have had numerous boyfriends who luckily have all acquired a prefix: EX). Ok, now out of the many boyfriends, this is one oke I will never admit to having ever had dated. No, no, no! I have manged to convince myself that I never did and I will forever work towards convincing everyone else. Hell no!!
Anyway, after that chat we both agreed that my ex (let’s call him W for the sake of characterization) is mad. To just put you in the picture, W is turning 30 this year but he has been carrying this self-importance for such a long time that you’d imagine he was in school with Kwame Nkrumah! He looks old and acts old (minus the wisdom part).
Ok, I’d rather stop giving you this profile because even the thought of him makes my stomach turn! Did I tell you he’s very ugly as well- ok, my granny said pple aint ugly; some of them just have interesting features- iiiiiii mar this one? (Sorry that was a ‘native’ subconscious moment)! So, yea W has been completely obsessed with me for almost three years now and can’t imagine me with anyone else. But yesterday, I mentioned to my friend that my once-upon-a-time-darling-ugly W told me that for as long as he lives I will never be with anyone else. He has kept his word. I have not been able to be with anyone else and even when I try things don’t work out. My latest potential boyfriend just told me that he’s gay! Well, not really my fault; he just happens to love other men which is completely perfect with me if only he could stop treating me like a stranger!
My friend’s theory therefore is that W cursed me. W literally LOCKED me! LOL apparently there has been some serious ‘African Science’ going on in his life and I need to go see him for unloocking my potential (ok, this is from an advert)! So, now here I am thinking about Witchcraft, madness and love and cant tell the difference!
By the way, i just happen not to believe in witchcraft but this theory is quite fun. Will explain to you how it works once I am off FB!
Love n peace